I have started an online workshop with Barbara Lewis called Painting with fire. Which is an enameling technique. Full of color possibilities. I really like it.
Then the same old c**p . The pain gets too bad to sit at the torch for more than 5 or 10 minutes. I pray I can figure out a way to set up my torch to alleviate the pain, and that then nothing else pops up that prevents me from continuing.
This is a little of my history. Its a little whiny so plz feel free to pass over it. Anyone who knows me knows that my original artistic incarnation was as a textile artist. I dyed my fabrics, did shibori ,Katazome, surface design, etc...
For me the joy and expression was the manipulation of color. How all the different factors could be exploited to achieve simply sublime color.
Unfortunately I am no longer able to do those things. I have had a hard time with that. Its been hard to deal with my issues alone and I think I have been in color mourning.
So I was thrilled to have found something similar in Painting with Fire. Not just a "Coloring in" process but the expression of color that I so enjoy. I am on the edge of despair that I may be unable to do this as well.
Again I am wondering why the Lord would make me this way without making me strong enough to pursue the passion. My faith tells me that He knows best and I trust that, completely. So then the doubt and confusion lands in my lap, its got to be me. What the heck am I doing wrong? What am I interpreting so incorrectly? And what am I to do about it? Pray? Oh I have been, telling myself to be patient for the answer. I know its not Him, its me. He is Abba and has provided for all things.
So what the heck is my problem!? The Lord only knows, and believe me He isnt talking about it!